Sir

I get misgendered by strangers fairly regularly, but as a person who doesn’t give a fuck about what pronouns a stranger selected as a good fit, I’m pretty okay with it.

But when someone knows my name or pronouns and calls me something different? That’s disrespect.

There is one person in my life who still regularly misgenders me. Ironically, he never knew me as a he/him human. All of his misgendering is from conclusions he’s arrived at on his own.

Today, after he slipped up, he deflected — telling me my pronouns (she/they) confused him (huh?). Sloppily grasping to be absolved of his mistake. You can be well intentioned and disrespectful at the same time.

We aren’t strangers. He knows my pronouns. So why is it he’s selected the he/him box for me? Did he decide my voice or my mannerisms are “sir”? Or, maybe it’s sexism — that he chalks my skillset up as manly. Gross.

I’ve got two testicles and a backbone stronger than his excuses.

Does that grant me knighthood? Am I Sir Carmyn?